It’s replying to emails, and ticking things off the to-do list, and waiting for responses, and marketing that is a never-ending rabbit hole, and hearing back from printers, and searching for photos, and meeting with consultants, and not being able to fit meetings in, and writing promotional copy for every platform, and hearing opinions like ‘lofty’ and ‘lots of work’ and ‘ambitious’ and ‘print?!’ and ‘perhaps you should have a plan B if you don’t sell that many?’ And where in the world might a retired mentor be at?
It’s enough to give me a daily 3pm headache and think, holy f*ck, what am I doing this for. I should just get back on the road….it’s possible to be on the road forever. What am I even looking for? What am I doing? What is the meaning to everything? Hah.
But then it happens.
Something small.
A message someone sends. A shirt someone has made. Poetry Naomi Wakan has written (that I’m finally getting around to reading each morning). Garlic someone has grown. A new friend. A quick sample of what my Art Director has put together.
And there it is. Right in that little screenshot. My ‘why’ appears out of the fog of entrepreneurship, and I remember.
Staring at the page that my lovely and talented Art Director Patrick has designed for the media kit, I think, “That’s why I’m doing this.” The page features a beautiful photo from, and of, the incredible Stephanie Artuso next to my writing that has been edited by smart and generous Margy Gilmour…that’s why I’m doing this!
That IS why I’m doing this, I think. I am doing this to showcase and celebrate a lifestyle. I am doing this to connect all the lonely or lovely people who are doing amazing things. And in doing this, I am connecting with strangers that I would never have met. So my dream of connecting has already begun, no matter what happens. And even if bad things do happen, the world won’t end. Well, I mean, it could end, but then I’d probably be dead so I wouldn’t know anyway. *shrugs*
I had a meeting with Mitch Miyagawa last week. Mitch replaced me at my last job as an Events Manager with the Gabriola Arts Council. For most of our meeting we were lost in the minutiae of what it is to live a planning life. But in the end, I popped out of the bogged-down reverie when Mitch got all excited and said something about one of the hosts he’s bringing to the festival.
And it happened again. I remembered. Something so small. The meaning behind the work.
It’s not about the emails, or the check-ins, or the missed details, or the trying to please an opinionated community, or the hotheads, or the getting shit done. It’s about making amazing things happen. It’s about fulfilling your own why, and, hopefully other people’s too, and all will sail smoothly.
This is what I remembered when Patrick sent me a quick screenshot of my words on a page. Folks, I am excited.
Sincerely,
Alina
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